Monthly Archives: April 2008

Day Two: Peace – Part II

Did you miss Part I?

I sat down, the hopelessness of my questions overtaking me, and cried ugly. As I wept, I felt the peaceful presence of One Who knew more than I, and I felt comfort in that peace. He spoke and I listened. He told of His love and of the everlasting nature of His love. His words held me as a mother holds her own, and I pleaded with Him not to stop. He showed me the finality of man’s love, but also the infinity of His own. He spoke a bit longer and then rose to leave. As He did, I felt the comfort leaving, too, and as if He knew, He turned and caught my eyes in His for what seemed an eternity. Something about that gaze made me uncomfortable and peaceful all at once, and yet it was unexplainable. Finally, He opened His mouth, His eyes never leaving mine, and the words He spoke were alive, cutting through my confusion, my hopelessness, my despair.

“I love you.”

He was gone, and yet, He wasn’t. His words hung in the air and surrounded me like the warmth of an early morning cup of joe. I rose to leave, sad now, sorry that I couldn’t stay in this place forever and feel the comfort of His words. And yet, the words came with me. They were everywhere I went, everywhere I looked. They were in the brush of the wind, the heat of the sun, the chill of the night. Everything echoed what He had said.

“I love you.”

I raised my hands to the heavens and smiled. Thank you! Thank you for those 3 simple, marvelous words! “I love you,” He had said. Present tense, never past. Once was, now is, it will always last. Love. The word is itself one of beginnings. It is a word that speaks of eternity.

Day One: Peace – Part I

“He loved you.”

Three simple words, spoken by a grieving widow, and yet they linger in my mind like they hung in the room at the funeral home. The man of whom she spoke, the man who had loved me, lay on the other side of the room in a box. It had been decorated with flowers and shiny handles so people wouldn’t think of it that way, but she and I both knew that it was, after all was stripped away, just a box.

I have to admit that, even though I tried hard not to, I cried a little as I walked away. And I soon realized that those three words had left with me. It seemed that everywhere I went, everywhere I looked, they were there. They were in the brush of the wind, the heat of the sun, the chill of the night. Everything seemed to echo what the widow had said.

“He loved you.”

But he was gone, and, so too, his love. At least that’s how it felt. I cried again, this time to God. Why? It was the best I could do, and yet no better than a child who didn’t get his way. Why does the love go? Why, when the ones we have loved and who have loved us are gone, does the love seem gone, too?

“He loved you.” Loved. Past tense, not present; once was, now isn’t. Loved. The word is itself one of ending. It is a word of finality.

Peace – Part II tomorrow…