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If you’re like the majority of Americans, you’ve made a few resolutions about how you can make this year better than the last one. If you’re really basic, then your resolutions are health or money related. The vast majority of us make resolutions, but only a few of us will actually keep them. In fact, studies show that only 8% of people who make New Year’s Resolutions will end up following through.

Since one of my goals this year is to help others be better, let me share 3 simple tips that will help you become one of the 8%.

Count the cost, then pay it

I’d say this could be the number one reason why most of us don’t keep the promises that we make to ourselves. We simply don’t consider what it will take and so the first time it seems harder than we expected, we stop. A simple fix to this would be to count the cost and only pursue the changes that you’re committed to no matter what it costs.

If the only time you can go to the gym is before the sun rises but you aren’t willing to get up in the dark, then you can talk about going to the gym 4 times a week, but the likelihood that you’ll make it there is slim. Not impossible, but when you really count the cost, it isn’t that realistic. A more realistic fitness goal might be to walk 4 times a week during the day 😉 .

The point here is that resolutions are often like house buying – we waste a lot of time looking at homes we’d never be able to afford instead of the ones we can. As a result, we end up staying in the house we already own even though we don’t really like it. This year, set a realistic goal with a price tag that you can afford to pay and are willing to pay and then do the work to make it happen.

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Start where you are, not where you wish you were

It might seem trite, but the biggest part of keeping that resolution you made is probably actually starting. But a lot of us start. Most of us will go to the gym at least once, eat at least one healthier meal, save at least a little bit more money. Starting isn’t the issue; the issue is continuing. In fact, studies have been done to show that most Americans don’t continue keeping their resolutions past January 12.

You read that right. 12 days. That’s how long most of our resolutions last.

Let me give you a tip to help you extend past that date: don’t try to do immediately what you haven’t been doing consistently. Too many times we want to start a new habit at a level that it could take years to achieve, and that’s a recipe for disaster. If you don’t read a lot now but want to read more in the new year, then don’t start trying to make up for all lost reading on January 1. You’d be better off reading 15 minutes than trying to read for an evening. So often we treat resolutions as a vehicle to make up for lost time, but resolutions are about improving the future you, not about erasing the past you. Start where you are, not where you wish you were.

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No matter how far you can go alone, you can go farther with others

I’m not going to argue against what each of us can accomplish on our own. In fact, if you’re going to be in the 8% who keep their resolutions, I can guarantee you that there will be lonely times when it will just be you and the goal and you’re going to have to find the motivation to keep going.

But at some point you’re going to need others who are cheering for you and who are holding you accountable. Trust me, it’s a lot easier to say no to an early morning run by yourself than to a friend who is already up and waiting for you to join him or her on that run. One of my favorite passages in the Bible says it like this:

Two are better than one,
    because they have a good return for their labor:
If either of them falls down,
    one can help the other up.
But pity anyone who falls
    and has no one to help them up.
Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
    But how can one keep warm alone?
¹Though one may be overpowered,
    two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

If you want to move away from the 80% of people who don’t keep their resolutions and move toward the 8% who do, then learn how to surround yourself with people who will help you up when you fall down instead of people who will kick you when you fall down. When you do, you’ll find a level of success you never knew was possible. Are relationships tricky? Can people sometimes make you just want to go it alone? Of course. But no matter how far you can go alone, you can go farther with others.

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Reading Time: 3 minutesSomething is happening right about now: the person you were in 2017 is meeting the person you want to be in 2018, and there’s a bit of a standoff. Actually, your brand new resolutions are beginning to wave the white flag of surrender, and it’s all because you didn’t leave the 2017 version of you in 2017.

If you truly desire to live differently in 2018, then there are a number of habits that you need to lay down as the foundation of what you’re building in the new year. I’m sure that there are many more than 4, but here are the first 4 that came to my mind as I was writing. Small improvements in these areas will lead to big success in leaving last year’s you in last year.

Generosity

Have you ever played the lottery game? I don’t mean the lottery. I mean the lottery game where you sit around and talk about all the things you’ll do if you ever win the lottery! Whenever I hear people play that game, I’m always struck by 2 things: they always want to do good and they don’t want the good to feel bad. So they practice “imaginary” generosity with “play” money instead of practicing real generosity with real money. Last year’s you may have thought, “I’ll give more to God when I have more” but that was the old you. This year, start practicing generosity with what you have now. Even if it’s just a little, intentionally start to give more of your time to people, more of your resources to charity, more of your talents to a cause.

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Devotions

You need to get intentional about your personal, “just me and Jesus” time. Be devoted to the development of your devotional life! So many arrive at the end of the year on fumes because, at some point during the year, they stopped putting fuel in the tank. Devotional time is the fuel. Set aside a time every day – for me, it’s in the morning – when you’ll connect with God and be reminded of what matters most. I love the simplicity of 3 John 1:2 – “Dear friend, I pray that you may enjoy good health and that all may go well with you, even as your soul is getting along well.” Devotion is soul time, and when you devote yourself to it, it pays off big time throughout the day!

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Community

I’m a pastor and so community is a really big deal for me and is something that we talk about a lot at The Gathering where I lead. But community isn’t a “church” thing. It’s a human thing! All of us were made to be in relationships with other people who were made for relationships, and nothing will drain the new you out of the new year faster than being alone. Do you know why? Because you’ll start to talk to yourself and convince yourself all of the reasons why you can’t change. “That was a stupid thing to try. I’ve tried it every year since 2000 and I still haven’t stuck with it.” You need others around you to help you stick with it when you feel like life is sticking you! There’s a story in the Bible about God’s army winning as long as Moses had his hands raised. Kind of a weird story, yes? But of course his arms got tired (think Survivor immunity challenge tired) and they would start to drop. When they did, the army started to lose. So 2 men – Aaron and Hur – sat Moses on a rock and held his arms up. That’s community, and that’s something you need as we move further into this new year.

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Sleep

If you’re like me, the more tired I get, the quicker I start to live like it’s all about me. You may not have expected something as practical as sleep to be in this list, but think of sleep as the intentional act of putting the oxygen mask on yourself first so that you are then able to help others around you. A rested you leads to a successful you.

One of the shortest chapters in the Bible – Psalm 127 – talks about striving to accomplish things in our own strength, and the second verse packs a punch and a promise:

“In vain you rise early
and stay up late,
toiling for food to eat—
for he grants sleep to those he loves.”

God’s got big plans for you in 2018 and He wants you refreshed and ready for the adventure. So sleep, and then get up and get to it!

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Reading Time: 2 minutesIt’s quiet and dark.

The early morning of a new year is so much different from the first few minutes after the ball drops.  No noisemakers. No fireworks. Just a world asleep, waiting to wake up to the wonder and the promise of a new start.

It won’t be long before the sun begins to rise, and with it, millions of authors who will begin to write page 1 of this brand new 365-page book we’ll all call “2015.”  Gyms will be joined, resolutions will be made, diets will be started.

A week or so from now, most of them will be forgotten, broken and failed, UNLESS you change one simple word.

This year, don’t just believe for something; believe toward something.

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Yes, hope springs eternal, but the problem with hope is that so many of us see it as  passive instead of active.  We’re sitting in a car hoping to go somewhere else but never turning the key and pushing the gas.

Resolutions require execution.

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So many of us quit trying because we’ve bought into the lie that the only scoreboard that matters is results. But what matters is the journey, and even more specifically, who you’re on the journey with and why, and once we get that right, we’ll find that what we’re believing for turns into what we’re believing towards.

There is an interesting chapter in the Bible that is often called the “Hall of Faith” because it includes so many men and women throughout history who trusted God in great ways.  In ways that you and I dream of trusting God.  It’s found in Hebrews 11, and the most curious verse in that chapter of amazing believers is verse 13:

All these people died still believing what God had promised them. They did not receive what was promised, but they saw it all from a distance and welcomed it. (New Living Translation)

Did you catch that?  If this was just about results, then every one of them failed.  They all joined the gym and quit before Valentines.  Every one of them set out to read the Bible in a year and never got past Genesis.  But what set them apart as examples of success and faith is one simple word:

They weren’t passively believing for something. They were actively believing toward something.

When you and I do that, we’ll find that this time next year, we’ll be further down the road than we are right now.  We’ll find that instead of quitting because we didn’t meet a goal or an expectation, we’re better because we just kept moving toward the goals that we’re pursuing.

So pick a destination, and then crank up the car and go.  You may not make it by the end of this year, or the next, or ever. But like those faithful men and women whose portraits hang in the Hall of Faith, you’ll be better because you’ve chosen to see better. They died still believing the promise because they “saw it all from a distance” and kept moving towards it, and movement is ALWAYS the first step to improvement.

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