The stalker God

Have you ever caught somebody staring at you?  Have you ever noticed that how you felt about it had a lot to do with who was watching you?  If it was that co-worker you’ve been attracted to, you felt excited.  A policeman?  You probably felt uneasy, like perhaps they knew something about you that you didn’t.  Your older neighbor with binoculars?  Just plain creepy.

Sometimes I read the Bible and feel like God’s a stalker.  Now, just using the word “stalker” already gives this a weird feeling, because in our society a stalker isn’t a good thing.  But one definition of a stalker is “a person who stealthily hunts or pursues an animal or another person,” and by that definition, we serve the stalker God.  He is so good at pursuing us, even when we don’t know it.  He’s all about stealth.

The truth is that we get a little uneasy knowing that He’s pursuing us like that, because most of the time we don’t feel very pursuable.  When we don’t feel like we’re at our best, the thought of being watched can make us a bit queasy, can’t it?  I mean, there’s a reason why showing up at school undressed or unprepared for a test are two of the more common recurring nightmares.  We don’t want our worst to be seen.

But that’s exactly what God is all about.  I love the story in the first chapter of John about Nathaniel’s encounter with Jesus.  When they met, Jesus talked to him as if they’d known each other already, and when Nathaniel asked how Jesus knew him, Jesus replied with, “I saw you while you were still under the fig tree.”  Say what?  Figs?  Really?

Here’s the big deal about figs and fig trees.  In that day, sitting under the fig tree was a phrase that meant that someone was studying the scrolls; they were thinking, wondering, questioning.  Jesus seeing Nathaniel at that moment in his life would have been a lot like you being called in front of the class and asked a question for which you had no answer.  It’s revealing, exposing, and can lead to that creepy, exposed, stalked feeling.

But not with Nathaniel.  His response was to tell Jesus what He already knew: “You are the Son of God; you are the King of Israel.”  Somehow, being seen by Jesus was different that being seen by your neighbor’s binoculars, and here’s why:

Stalkers stalk people based on a false sense of reality.  They watch a famous actress in the movies and assume the person is the same as they character they portrayed.  Or they see a model in a photo shoot and forget that most of what they saw was the work of a geek with a computer and Photoshop.  Stalkers are selfish and hunt people down for their own selfish pleasure.

But Jesus shows a different type of stalker.  The stalker God pursues you and me based on reality.  He sent Jesus knowing who we really are, how we really are.  The real you and the real me never catch God by surprise.  He saw us “under the fig tree” questioning, wondering, trying to make sense of this crazy up and down life we live.  He knows us at our core – perhaps even better than we know ourselves – and He still pursues us relentlessly.

He doesn’t want us to freshen up a bit, or put our best foot forward first.  He wants us like we are.  Addicted, afflicted, helpless and unsure.  He sees us, and somehow, like Nathaniel, I want that to make all the difference.

I want that to draw me even closer to the stalker God.

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